When Jennette McCurdy spoke to Anna Faris on the Unqualified podcast, she said writing her book, I’m Glad My Mom Died, gave her closure. That closure has allowed Jennette to miss her mom without also being angry at her when she thinks of her. I honestly don’t know how that’s possible, she’s a much bigger person than me. The stories Jennette’s told are shocking and I’m not sure I ever would have been able to let go of the anger. Like the latest one Jennette shared on Red Table Talk. She read an email from her mother, Debbie, that she’s included in her memoir. Debbie had seen a photo of Jennette on TMZ with some man. Debbie wrote Jennette to ask what had happened to her, “perfect little angel” and proceeded to call her a series of vile names before telling her the family had disowned her. Following that, Debbie added a postscript telling Jennette to send her money for a new refrigerator.
In a clip from the RTT conversation shared exclusively with PEOPLE, (Jennette) McCurdy reads aloud an email she once received from her mom about seeing a TMZ photo of her online.
McCurdy’s mom Debbie died of cancer in 2013. The iCarly alum looks back at childhood fame and her past struggles in the new memoir I’m Glad My Mom Died.
Debbie began by writing, “I am so disappointed in you,” in the email, which is included in McCurdy’s book. McCurdy continues reading as Jada, Willow and Adrienne react in shock.
“‘You used to be my perfect little angel, but now you are nothing more than a little’ — all caps — ‘slut, a floozy, all used up,’ ” McCurdy reads. “‘And to think you wasted it on that hideous ogre of a man. I saw the pictures on a website called TMZ. I saw you rubbing his disgusting hairy stomach. I knew you were lying about Colton.’ (I had told her I was with a friend, Colton.) Add that to a list of things you are: liar, conniving, evil.”
“‘You look pudgier too. It’s clear you’re eating your guilt,’ ” she continues reading.
“‘Thinking of you with his ding-dong inside of you makes me sick. Sick! I raised you better than this. What happened to my good little girl? Where did she go and who is this monster that has replaced her? You’re an ugly monster now. I told your brothers about you and they all said they disown you just like I do. We want nothing to do with you. Love, Mom — or should I say Deb since I am no longer your mother? P.S. Send money for a new fridge; ours broke.’ ”
McCurdy adds with a laugh, “The P.S. gets me,” as Willow, 21, reacts with a “Wow!”
I know I shouldn’t agree with Jennette on the title of her book, but I’m glad she doesn’t have to deal with this anymore. That email is wholly unacceptable from anyone, let alone a parent to a child. Obviously, Debbie had some real issues, including disassociation by signing off with “Love” and asking for money from someone she just disowned. It’s also tragic because she knows the control she has over Jennette. I’ll bet Jennette sent the money for that refrigerator. Like she told Anna, she didn’t know the abuse she was being subjected to.
When Jennette first started speaking about her mother’s abuse, she told us about how her mother forced eating disorders upon her. Hearing that long arm of shame reaching out to manipulate Jennette by calling her “pudgier” and accusing her of “eating her shame” just makes my blood boil. It’s like a switch in a disordered eater’s brain and those who intentionally flip it are so cruel. It takes forever to flip it back off. Of course, the slut shaming is just another abuser’s tactic. Debbie hit all the misogynist buttons and so succinctly. I have yet to read Jennette’s book. I wonder where she is with her brothers now. Did they ever see Debbie for who she was? Because no one in Hollywood protected Jennette and I’m positive Debbie’s true colors bled through when she was on set. They just didn’t care as long as they got the performance they wanted out of Jennette. It’s a good thing Jennette has been freed of that relationship.