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bitchy | Are the Duke & Duchess of Cambridge headed to New Zealand this fall?

When the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge completed their Caribbean Flop Tour disaster in late March, there was a palpable feeling of “well, they’re never doing THAT again.” The Flop Tour went so badly that even the sycophantic royal reporters couldn’t sugercoat it. It was an unmitigated, tone-deaf disaster. I remember thinking that it would be a long time before we saw William and Kate do any kind of tour like that again, and royal analysts halfway agreed. The idea now is that Kate and William won’t be sent on tours in the same way nowadays, and in the rare moments when they do “tour,” it will only be to majority-white countries, and Bill and Cathy won’t even attempt to do any kind of outreach to communities of color. It’s also funny that “touring countries and leaving the colonialist cosplay at home” isn’t even on the table. The royals are hellbent on colonialist cosplay, it’s their raison d’être, so that was never an option.

I bring all of this up because this fall will be pretty interesting. We already know that the Cambridges will try to visit America for William’s sad Earthshot Prize busywork. We know that they have “an America problem,” and they’re trying to charm and gurn their way into glowing American media coverage. But now there’s a suggestion that William and Kate have been invited to tour Australia and New Zealand this fall, to coincide with the women’s Rugby World Cup in October/November.

On Saturday, Prince William hosted New Zealand’s Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern at Kensington Palace. This meeting has fuelled speculation that the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are soon heading over to New Zealand and Australia. Speaking on Australia’s Today show, 9Honey’s royal reporter Natalie Oliver discussed the royal tour speculation.

Ms Oliveri said: “Prince William met with Jacinda Ardern on Saturday [July 2]. Now, the meeting has fueled speculation that the Cambridges are heading to New Zealand and also, Australia.”

She added: “Jacinda presented Prince William with a couple of rugby-themed things, a jersey and a ball, and also a book. Kate is patron of two rugby associations so that, sort of, you know, are they going to be heading there”.

She noted that the rugby world cup, the female rugby world cup, is happening in October in New Zealand, so, you know, its a good sign.”

The royal expert also stated that the Duke and Duchess have had an invite to Australia, which is “adding to that speculation”. The invite came from Western Australia’s premier Mark McGowan.

She said: “He personally wrote to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge asking them to come to Perth. This is for the inaugural football, international festival of football.”

[From The Daily Express]

It wouldn’t surprise me if William and Kate made their big “return” to royal touring with a breezy tour through Australia and New Zealand. While Princess Anne visited Australia for the Jubbly, her tour barely garnered any media or excitement. The last tour Down Under which generated excitement and pizzazz was, gulp, the Sussexes’ tour in 2018. Kate and William haven’t been to Australia and New Zealand since 2014. So… yeah, it’s possible. I wonder about the reception they would get in Oz though, especially given the small-r republican prime minister.

The only thing that makes me think that Will and Kate will avoid touring in Oz/NZ is the fact that they’re building up the trip to America this fall. It seems very unlikely that these two lazy dumbasses would do, like, a three-week tour Down Under in October, and then head to Boston in November. The poor sausages would need four months, minimum, to recover from an Oz tour.

Photos courtesy of Instar.

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